Source: The Conversation – Canada
Three years ago, I wrote an article for The Conversation Canada about rape culture when actor Danny Masterson went to jail for sexual assault. His friends from That ’70s Show, Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher, had written letters of support for him because he was a such a great friend and they wanted the judge to be lenient in sentencing.
I argued this episode illustrated several elements of what is called rape culture — so-called good guys don’t rape, women are to blame for sexual assault and victims probably consented and shouldn’t be believed.
Two years ago, five former Major Junior hockey players went on trial for sexual assault after a consensual sexual encounter with one player and one woman became a group sex activity after the player in question texted his buddies to “be in a three-way quick.” Multiple players took him up on it and joined in.
Read more:
Hockey Canada sex assault verdict: Sports culture should have also been on trial
I believed at the time that regardless of the outcome — the five players were acquitted and several are now back in the NHL — there was at least a fair bit of condemnation of the behaviour of the men in this one-woman, five-man scenario.
If it didn’t rise to the legal definition of assault, perhaps it would provide a cautionary tale for men thinking they could invite other men into their room to have sex with the woman they just had sex with. It was, at least, a moral failure. Maybe it would lead to culture change in these elite male environments, and with it their sense of entitlement to women’s bodies.
The Cornell 7 case
Apparently not. Cornell University has found itself in a crisis of its own making after a former student launched a civil suit alleging she was gang-raped at a fraternity over several hours by up to seven men. One of those men texted his buddies that there was “free pussy” to be had, and one allegedly hit her so hard during the attack that it left bruises on her buttocks.
The Cornell case illustrates several aspects of rape culture that still prevail. The campus police didn’t record her statement that she had been raped. The district attorney failed to prosecute because she was “voluntarily intoxicated.” Some of the men in the frat played on the rugby team and were considered good guys; one of the alleged assailants was her friend.
The complainant initially didn’t come forward because she thought she was a “whore” for what had happened to her.“ She was the victim, and yet her socialization and lived experience told her that “putting herself in that position” qualified her as a “slut.”
In her mind at first, she was the problem, not the men who allegedly assaulted her.
In this mindset, women who have sex outside of marriage or relationships are sluts. Women who dress provocatively or get drunk at parties are sluts. Women who have sex with multiple men are sluts. And sluts need to be punished.
There is a long and sordid history of western rape laws that show us how raped women have been portrayed. Unless they were virgins, had bruises and had some kind of corroboration, it wasn’t rape. Men could legally rape their wives until 1983 in Canada, to name just one example, so it’s not a stretch to see that victim-blaming and slut-shaming are deeply rooted in popular culture. It will apparently take multiple #MeToo and #IamJaneDoe moments before men (and women) understand what consent looks like.
Read more:
#MeToo turns 5: Taking stock of gender-based violence in Canadian politics
Slut-shaming in popular culture
Women can, of course, slut shame with the best of them. American media personality Megyn Kelly has come under fire for suggesting that the victim liked the attention from the men, alleging that’s because she isn’t very attractive.
United States President Donald Trump used the same trope to argue that he couldn’t have sexually assaulted E. Jean Carroll because she wasn’t his “type” — a classic rape myth that suggests the victim actually wanted the abuse and that the perpetrator doesn’t “need” to rape because, in Trump’s case, he can “grab ‘em by the pussy” with impunity.
Many universities participate in sexual violence prevention programs, including consent workshops and bystander training, especially for freshman students. Cornell University probably did, too.
Just last week, St. Francis Xavier University in Antigonish, N.S., had to deal with an episode of rape culture when a sign was posted on off-campus housing that suggested arch-rival Acadia University football players should drop off their girlfriends there. An outcry has ensued but it raises serious questions about how much good university consent and bystander education is actually doing.
In the future, I hope police on campus, community police investigators and prosecutors look carefully at alleged gang-rape situations before they put it down to partying, intoxication, attention-seeking or remorse. Do investigators really think most women enjoy having sex with several men at a time? Is this a plausible situation outside of pornography or sex work?
In case anyone’s operating under false assumptions about the effects of group sex on women’s bodies (the Cornell incident’s Jane Doe got a urinary tract infection immediately afterwards), I once interviewed a voluntary and otherwise thriving sex worker for my book on slut-shaming. She told me she’d given up group sex and paid orgies because they were so hard on her body.
If we surveyed all sexually active, heterosexual women, would group sex be a realistic desire?
How to consent when overpowered?
What does consent look like when a woman is surrounded by several rugby or hockey players excited about “free pussy.” When a woman like Jane Doe says she was “pretty OK” with some of what happened, it should raise some basic consent concerns.
Classic consent education often uses the acronym FRIES to illustrate what consent means. As common sense as they may appear to those of us working or researching in the area, the five elements of consent bear repeating:
- Freely given (no manipulation, alcohol or plying women with ketamine)
- Reversible (they can change their mind at any time)
- Informed (they knows what they are agreeing to; not advertised without their knowledge like property, as in “free pussy”)
- Enthusiastic (active and eager, not “pretty OK”)
- Specific (saying yes to one thing or man does not mean agreeing to sex with all the others).
The culture must change, institutions must change and male attitudes that women are playthings who can be passed around from one man to another must change.
Meredith Ralston has received funding from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council.
Original source: https://analysis1.mil-osi.com/2026/10/08/the-cornell-7-case-proves-were-still-trapped-in-a-rape-culture-deja-vu/